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Maternity Photos

6 Jun

Below you will find some of our maternity photos…these are unedited but I wanted to share.

Gradneylo-16 Gradneylo-19 Gradneylo-43 Gradneylo-63 Gradneylo-78 Gradneylo-85 Gradneylo-95 Gradneylo-108 Gradneylo-156 Gradneylo-166 Gradneylo-174 Gradneylo-178 Gradneylo-195 Gradneylo-203 Gradneylo-206


8 Weeks Away

29 Apr

We are 8 weeks away from my due date. I can’t believe it’s so close. Every time I think about it I feel like crying. I don’t feel like my home is ready. The room has clothes all over the place and no decorations on the wall. I know that babies don’t need decorations but I do.

My wife’s job had a joint baby shower for her and a coworker. I realized during the shower how comfortable I am in my pregnant body. Listening to the other pregnant woman and the mother’s in the room discuss how much they hated getting bigger made me sad. Being pregnant is a journey, your body is making a human, and I don’t think you should feel shamed.


This past weekend I went to the emergency room because I was having weird chest pains. I was in the hospital for five hours and was diagnosed with atypical chest pains. They ruled out all the scary stuff — pneumonia, heartache, etc. The doctor thinks that my chest pain was either gas/heartburn or radiating shoulder pain. Last night my chest finally stopped hurting around 11 pm. I haven’t had any chest pain today. So that’s great.

My cousin came over to our new place and was shocked by the small size. People like to ‘apologize’ for the size of the new place —- don’t worry about it, you all are doing what you have to do? I have no issues with the size of our place. I guess people see it as a step down from our house. We lost a bedroom and some square footage; but our quality of life has truly increased. Moving was one of the decisions we’ve ever made.

A Journey to Sisterhood

22 Mar

Happy TEA Me

I first learned about Greek lettered organizations (GLOs) when I was in college. The idea of a group of people being unified under one mission, purpose, and vision really resonated with me. Seeing the support that members gave each other and the work that they did in the community was something I wanted to be a part of. As I began to research GLOs I never felt like I fit into any of the traditional sisterhoods.

Through personal research I found out about LGBT GLOs. I felt like these organizations would provide me with the type of sisterhood that I was looking for. I wanted to be apart of an LGBT GLO because I wanted my whole being to be accepted, respected, and supported by the organization that I was a member of. I didn’t want to feel tolerated in a particular chapter and ignored in another. I wanted to know that the organization was as proud of me as I was of them. This journey started in 2002, I have started and stopped along my journey to find a sisterhood I could call my own.


I can now say with a full heart that my journey has ended. I have found everything that I have ever wanted in a GLO from Theta Epsilon Alpha ( My heart is overcome with joy, gratitude, and love. I am proud to be a member, proud of my sisters, and proud of the organization.

Since 2002 I have been putting in work to find a GLO I connected with, I have been honest with myself, and I have been patient. I wake up everyday thankful for my sisterhood, thankful for my sisters, and full of love. I am thankful to the women of Theta Epsilon Alpha Sorority for showing me true sisterhood. I am proud to be apart of a sorority that supports self-identified femme lesbian and queer women.

I just had to share.

Happy Group of TEAcakes

No Longer Where We Live

19 Mar

My wife and I put the final works on our home. It hit me a little hard when I realized we wouldn’t be bringing the baby home to our house.



Our tenants move in this Saturday. Several neighbors already meet them and said they seemed really nice. I do miss seeing my neighbors and I miss my house. However, I now have an 8 minute commute to work and my wife has a 12 minute commute to work. We have truly increased our quality of life and this will mean so much more once the baby is here.

Pregnancy Updates

I am now 26 weeks pregnant and we have yet to get the baby’s room together. My mother-in-law doesn’t live close to the store we did our baby registry; so I am making a new registry at a new store. My hope is to only have one registry and get at least 50% of the items on the registry. We’ll see what happens.

The baby moves around a lot and I can see the movements when I look at my belly. My feet have begun to swell and I have been trying to remind myself to put my feet up at work.

Next week I will take my gestational diabetes test. I’m nervous about it but whatever the results are I will continue to what is necessary for a healthy pregnancy. At my last appointment in total during this pregnancy I have only gained 5.8 pounds.


Thank You 2012 — Greetings 2013

1 Jan


Well I am so happy to be welcoming a new year. Last year at this time my wife had been home from the hospital for several hours. I was super tired because I was afraid to go to sleep because I wanted to make sure she was still breathing. During 2012 we had a long road of recovery for Charlie. My mother-in-law was at our house stressing me out and crying every couple of minutes. I was so sad for her and for my wife.

During 2012 we found out that my grandmother-in-law was battling breast cancer for the second time. Three family members had surgeries. My father-in-law ended up in the hospital and had to have a stint placed in his heart. My Aunt got really sick due to vertigo. My wife hurt her ankle playing softball.

Yet and still 2012 brought some fabulous moments. We got our bug fat positive and are now 15 weeks pregnant. We are in the process of moving and renting out our home. We celebrated our four year marriage anniversary; and us being together for eight years. Peanut celebrate another year. The beginning of Theta Epsilon Alpha Sorority (www., a sisterhood for femme identified lesbian and queer women.

We are super excited for 2013!


So I am 15 weeks pregnant and super excited. My belly is significantly rounder than it has ever been. However, it is magically not super noticeable. People who know that I’m pregnant try to touch my belly or talk to it and that bothers. I’m not sure if I will ever get use to that. Since I have licks I have dealt with people trying to touch my hair and I HATE it. So I’m hoping I don’t snap at anyone.

I have been dealing with some itching on my belly but bought some Burt’s Bees Mama Bee Belly Butter and that has really helped. My wife took me out and bought me some maternity clothes ( i.e. pants, dress, shirt, etc). I really needed the pants.



Charlie Update

21 Jan

This Friday I received a call at work from Charlie stating that they wanted her to go back to the hospital for another vascular ultrasound. They were afraid that she may have another blood clot that has formed due to some recent pain that she had in her leg.

So I left work, meet up with Charlie, and headed towards the hospital. While in the waiting room and during her ultrasound I remember feeling like I was going to pass out or burst into tears. I kept my composure and supported my wife who was equally as concerned.


The vascular ultrasound tech informed us that the clots in Charlie’s leg are gone and there are no new clots. Big smiles spread across our faces. Today while I was volunteering, Charlie received a phone call from our doctor saying that all of her recent test results came back normal. Which is excellent since her last set of test results reported abnormal liver  function. My wife’s recent leg pain is because of too much activity. Basically she needs to sit down. So all in all things are getting better for my Charlie.


Charlie and Peanut 🙂

Our Happy New Year

5 Jan

The end of my 2011 and the beginning of my 2012 has been hard, trying, and stressful. We drove to visit my In-Laws and when we got there my wife’s right leg was hurting really bad. It was a 13 hour drive and she assumed that it was a muscle strain. The whole week that we were there she wasn’t feeling really tired, her leg was hurting, and she was really short of breath sometimes.

On the drive back home her leg was hurting even more. When we got home she could barely walk and she seemed really really tired. So I helped her up the stairs. The next morning she was complaining about a rash under her arm so she made a doctors appointment. I urged her to tell the doctor about her leg; she argued with me about how doctors don’t like when you bring up stuff that you didn’t make the appointment for. I told her that if she didn’t tell the doctor I would take her to urgent care.

While at the doctor my wife didn’t want to say anything about her leg hurting. However, remembering what I said she told the doctor. Well our doctor wanted her to go to the hospital to have a vascular ultrasound. So I made her drive home so I could take her to the hospital. Well we found out that my wife had two blood clots in her right leg. She ended up being taken to the emergency room. When we got there they did a scan of her chest and found out that she had a pulmonary embolism in her right lung. With that she was admitted into the hospital. My mother-in-law flew into town and spent time with us in the hospital.

My wife has been home for a few days and I have been spending my new year cherishing life and our tomorrow.